Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Bratty Boy

At last, Mommy is letting me update MY blog. She said she wasn't letting me before because my tests were making me naughty and she needed a break from me because she says if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. I think it's really because she started her own blog and isn't paying enough attention to ME.

Well, enough about Mommy, let's talk some more about ME, shall we? I have had a very exciting week. Our neighbors told Mommy that I have been barking a lot when she is at work, and this has become a Problem. I don't see the problem at all. Mommy doesn't like it when I bark, but sometimes it's fun, so I just make sure to do it when no one is home and I can bark as loud and as long as I like. In fact I am being very considerate.

Mommy said it was my tests acting up and I was bored so she tried adding another dogwalker and also having a trainer come in. Well, I didn't like the other dogwalker one bit so I made crazy mean barks and chased him away from my crate! (Have you ever seen the opening scene from Jurassic Park? That was me.) He was a new male who came in without being properly introduced. He needs to pay proper respect to my territory before I will accept him. Roger, my regular walker, knows this and we get along great.

Then I met a trainer the next day and I put my teeth on her hand just to let her know she's not the boss of me unless she has treats. I didn't bite her, I just put my teeth there. Then when I found out she had yummy treats, I lay down next to her and watched her the entire time and showed her all the commands requests* I know. Mommy said she was "at the end of her rope" but I have never seen her on a leash so I don't know what she means. At the same time P-Daddy was away on business - again, I don't understand why humans take so long to do their business! Maybe they should eat more fiber and try wearing the Gentle Leader sometime because that makes me do my business right away so I can come home and get it OFF again.

Anyway, my plan to have my humans cater to all my needs seems to be working perfectly. I have taught them a chase game to play before every walk because I hate the Gentle Leader. I had Mommy with her bad shoulders going for 20 minutes one night. They tried the "touch and come" with high value treats, but as long as I smell the Gentle Leader near them I don't come. Sometimes we vary the chase game and I will sit for them just long enough for them to get close and then we play chase again. I don't need to go potty that badly anyway, and it is shameful being seen outside with that thing on my nose. Plus we live in a "loft" which is basically an indoor dog run with lots of open space to run in circles around the furniture.

Anyway, after we play chase for a while I feel sorry for my people, especially Mommy, so I let her catch me and put the Gentle Leader on. You have to set your people up for success, and that means rewarding them when they give you the behavior you want. So then I walk very calmly and do all my business very quickly and Mommy has started taking me to the dog run every morning to play with all my new friends. Mommy makes me sit nicely before she lets me into the run to play with my friends, and I'm getting a lot better at teaching her that "sit" means I want something. She's pretty good at figuring out what I want, too.

However, I still occasionally bark a bit even when I'm exhausted from the dog run. Somebody has to keep intruders out of the apartment, and that's my job.

*Requests I fulfill when I feel like it:
sit, down, up (stand), stay, here (come), hand target, wait, heel, roll, quiet, drop it, leave it, bedtime, in the car, find it/get it (retrieve, find hidden toy)


Pacco de Mongrel said...

oh, u lucky dog....u got private trainer n dog walker at your doorstep..

u know wat i did while owner is away? i juz SLEEP .....zzzzzzz

Peanut said...

Oh sounds like you almost have your humans all the way trained. Keep working on it.

Biggie-Z said...

Mommy and P-Daddy were talking about no more tests for me. Well, if they were all out of control maybe they need to be shown who is boss.