Wednesday, October 1, 2008


A man stopped us while I was walking the Canine Good Citizen this morning. He was admiring Biggie and I thought he was going to ask to pet him, or what breed he was, etc. Instead, our conversation went like this:

"Do you know of an animal doctor around here?"
[looking around for sign that man is harboring a small animal on his person] "uh, no... There may be one on 44th or 45th St., but I take my dog to a vet on the other side of town."

"Can you tell by looking at a dog if he's fixed?"

[is this a trick question? a new pick-up line? Biggie is now doing the dog equivalent of a kid shifting his weight from side to side, impatiently waiting for us to continue walking to the playground]
"um... he has nuts?!"

[I still do not know why I blurted out "nuts" as opposed to some other euphemism, I also wish I could see my face when I answered him, because I was silently adding "you moron" at the end of my response.]

"If you have a dog, would you recommend that he be fixed?"

The man nodded thoughtfully, said "Kthanksbai," and walked on.


Booker the Treeing Walker said...

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA! that's a good one! the very definition of RANDOMNESS!

PS Booker and Water: he doesn't mind the rain if there is no thunder. I don't think he will swim. He drinks and pees in the kiddie pool, but won't lay in it. He runs on wet grass, but won't poo on it -- he'd rather use the sidewalk. He loves to splash through puddles and tolerates his bath. He won't drink from the hose, but likes it placed on the opposite side of the bowl so that it creates a gentle ripple. Talk about HIGH MAINTENANCE ...

Saint Lover said...

hahahahahaahahahahahah hahahahahahahahahah!!!!!!!!!! OMG I can just imagine you saying that too! That guy certainly doesn't sound like he is fit to be a dog owner... I can't imagine what was going on in his little WTF pea brain.

(on a similar note... my mother in law was convinced that her cat was a female, named it Gracie and even argued withe me when I pointed out that female cats typically don't have HUGE NUTS staring at you under their tails....)

Victor and PeterPan said...

We miss our .... "nuts." Speaking of which, our weird Mom once asked the vet to put the removed nuts of one of her prior dogs in a container for her to show to her 4-H group. So she brought them (looking like nasty, veined meatballs) to show the group at a rented location and accidentally FORGOT them in the frige at the rented space. We only hope someone didn't mistake them for food...

Georgeous said...

Strange but true - real live NUTS walking on your streets, we have some here in the uk too.
No dog should be fixed - they should be pure movement BOL
Love George

Lindsay said...

Hahaha! I don't even know how I would've responded to that question. That is just so weird.

Mango said...

Some strange peoples living in your city, Biggie.


Lois Lane/Laney said...

In my county in Indiana, unless you have a breeder’s license, it's illegal to NOT spay or neuter!

Peanut said...

people are odd

Balboa & Mommy said...

hahahahaha, was that guy serious????? I think my mommy would have added "you moron".

Sorry about missing DWB, mommy will help me do a new post this afternoon.

Frenchie Snorts

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Chris and Mackenzie said...

LOL! I don't even know what to say...speechless.

Huck said...

Biggie, your mom must have an approachable, friendly vibe to her. Weird.

jan said...

Probably best not to bring up false testicles for the neutered dog.

Biggie-Z said...

Jan, I thought the same thing as I was walking away!

P-Daddy thinks the guy was trying to pick me up. P-Daddy obvi has not seen me in kuvasz-walking-wear. It is so hoTTT and seXXXy, especially at 7am.

This guy did not look like the typical semi-homeless WTFs around -he looked pretty normal, until he opened his mouth. To give him the benefit of the doubt, maybe he had found a stray and wasn't sure what to do with it. But still... a question like - "I took in a stray last night and don't know what to do with it now" would have been a perfectly normal question.